Yesterday my friend challenged me to come up with the 5 commandments that Moses dropped. It gave me something to do on the way home. I liked so many of the ideas that hit me, I expanded to 10. Here they are and none of them are meant to be offensive, but I'm sure some will be.
10) Make your sabbath Saturday, just to be different.
9) Thou shalt keep two sets of dishes, but thou shan't keep two sets of books
8) Refrain from using the word "shan't" in any sentence
7) Thou shalt migrate annually to the Catskills.
6) Never shalt thou witness false bears
5) Thou shalt not covet your neighbors donkey, no matter how attractive he may be.
4) Thou shalt eat lots of pork
3) Thou shalt never buy retail
2) Deuteronomy as you want me to DeuteronoYOU.
1) Sacrificing a lamb brings you good luck - unless you are a lamb.
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